Belligerent Bex #199

finally earned my name & number tonight. there is a long, long way to go for me, but i do feel MAJOR improvements this month. my goal is to be rostered for next months bout, which means i am going to have to be operating at 100% at every.single.practice this month. i’ve been crosstraining really hard and eating really clean so i have no doubt i have the physicality to do it, i just need to work on my basic derby skills. 

also, since i am a turd human, i made my number 199, tom brady’s draft pick number. which i think gives me an accurate starting point but a lot to live up to/grow into. i love football yo. 

i took my skills test for the second time tonight. i feel confident but i probably should not. i did not get the 27 laps in 5 minutes for the wftda min skills, but i did get 25, which is enough to play for the b-team. i would love to get the 27 soon. there are other skills that i do well, but i am just…not fast. i thought i did reasonably well on everything else, excluding my 180s and 360s, which i managed, but since i just started transitioning last week, they are still VERY sloppy. and the pack work was tough, since they had us doing our pack knee taps & plows with girls who have only been skating for a week, so…they can’t do knee taps and plows. i also very lightly tapped a cone & missed a cone in the weaving. and i hope someone on coaching saw the second half of my double knee falls because my first two sucked because my knee pads were slipping. aaah. and my hops & jumps were definitely improved from my first go, but i’m still not sure if i made the 6 inches high & 18 inches laterally. 

what’s terrifying is that i do feel that i should get an email saying i passed (or that i’m scrimmage ready as they’re doing it now even though i’ve scrimmaged a bunch) and i’m going to be devastated if i don’t because i feel that i will. i don’t get my hopes up for things- i either think i will get them, or i think that i wont. and my track record of getting everything i want has made me recklessly hopeful. but in my head i get an email tomorrow saying i passed and a letter in the next month saying i was accepted to columbia, so it better work out that way or shit’s gonna get UGLY.